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Depending on your up bringing, you believe things happen based on preordination, a higher power, God, making all the decisions for you. Others believe that people have free will and choose to let things happen. Another group believe life events are chains of unrelated events that link together randomly with no pattern. The latter are whom I call the ‘shit happens’ group. Events in my life place me squarely in the shit happens group.
My name is not Ted although most everyone calls me Ted. Ted, or TED, are my initials, my name is Thomas Edward Davidson. How or when I became Ted, I do not know. I do know that people only use my name when one or another shit happens event has a less than positive outcome. I do not take risks or intend negative results, however, sometimes I do not think things through thoroughly. Such is my current dilemma.
I am 19 attending a local college and I have not declared a major because I cannot see a career path right now. The first year or two, I plan to get all the required subjects out of the way. The college provides a career aptitude exam that I plan taking next year.
I will not bore you with a physical description, I am not a muscled up jock, I am not a beanpole geek, I am just a normal guy of 19. I live at home with my parents and my 18-year-old sister who is only eight months younger. Stop doing the math she is adopted.
Her name is Nicole Swanson. She came to our house as a homeless girl of ten, homeless and orphaned. She was one of many foster children my parents took in to give temporary homes. Nicole was different; she was a perfect fit for a daughter and a sister. As a family affair, we adopted her. My parents did not change her name to Davidson; they decided to let her make that choice later in life.
Mom and dad stopped taking in fosters after adopting Nicole, I was never sure why that was. Now, years later, I deduce it was because two young teens going through their changes at the same time put a strain on them.
From the first day Nicole came into the house, I felt an attachment to her. The first night we went to bed, I hugged her and kissed her goodnight, a ritual we still practice eight years later. In recent months, since Nicole turned 18, the nightly hug and kiss has become more meaningful.
Nicole and I developed a love and trust bond early. We confide in each other more than any other. We talk about school events, activities, girls or guys we date. We talk about our likes and dislikes. A couple weeks kartal escort ago, she asked if she should legally take the Davidson last name.
“It is a silly reason, really. Everyone calls you Ted. If I change my name, I could be NED, Nicole Elizabeth Davidson.” Nicole’s eyes had a gleam in them after relating we would be Ted and Ned.
“I don’t think Ned fits you, you are much too pretty to have a guy nick name.” That line caused a redoubling of the gleam in her eyes.
Nicole jumped up, encircled me in her arms, “Ted, am I really pretty to you?” Her hug had a different feel suddenly.
“Nicole,” I began, “you were pretty the day you walked into house eight years ago. You are lovely today, pretty face, eyes hotter than laser beams, and forgive me for noticing, you grew into a beautiful woman.”
“A beautiful woman, you think I am beautiful?”
“I can give a litany of reasons why I think you’re beautiful, and most are not guy reasons. We trust each other, we are honest with each other, we confide the most personal things to each other, we sense the others feelings and moods. That kind of relationship is simply beautiful. Therefore, Nicole you are beautiful.” Nicole gave me sweet kiss on my lips and bound off.
Saturday morning, Nicole and I were watching some stupid kids TV having coffee and bagels. What a sophisticated pair we made – coffee and bagels watching Sponge Bob Square Pants. “Nicole, I want to take you out tonight. How about a nice dinner and a movie.”
“I’ll have to get permission from my mom and dad, they may not approve.” Nicole got up finding mom and dad in the kitchen. She made a point to talk loudly enough for me to hear. “Mom and dad, a guy asked me out to dinner and a movie, can I go?”
Dad took the bait, “You know we do not approve of you going out if we have not met the boy.” Mom agreed.
“Ted, mom and dad say I can’t go out with you.” Nicole laughed at herself as much as mom and dad.
“Nicole, why are you playing us like this, you’re eighteen, start acting like it.” I heard the humor in mom’s voice.
“Ted, they changed their minds.”
Dad called out for me to come to the kitchen. “Ted, why the interest to take Nicole on a date?”
“Date? Dad, its not a date, I just want to give Nicole a night out, a nice dinner and a movie. There’s no mystery here, we go out together a lot.”
Nicole put on a pouting face, “First you ask me for a date, and now you tell me it’s not a date. What maltepe escort bayan kind of guy are you.”
“Do we have to give you a curfew,” dad asked. Mom said that we should be home by 2:00 at the latest since we are adults. “That will give you time for dinner and a late show.” Nicole and I left the kitchen for more mindless Sponge Bob overhearing mom tell dad they need to talk about us.
“Ted, what do you think they want to talk about? You don’t think they have ideas?” I love when Nicole gets into a questioning, second guessing mood. She lets her mind wonder to play possibilities and probabilities.
“Let them think whatever they want. All that is important is my, shall I say the word desire, desire to give you a fun night out.” How will Nicole respond hearing I have desire, now I am playing her second-guessing.
“A few days ago, you said I am pretty and you said beautiful. Now, you tell me you desire me. Am I safe with you?” Obviously, Nicole held on to each word I say or said. “You don’t plan taking advantage of a young virgin do you?” Her demeanor changed as she said young virgin. Did she intend to say that, more wondering.
Sitting on the floor together, leaning back on couch cushions, “Take my hand Nicole.” She wove her fingers through my fingers. “I have many desires and one is keeping you safe and secure forever.” Our hands squeezed tightly.
We looked into one another’s eyes, Nicole looked into my being and scared me not sure what she sensed, felt, or saw. I know I felt love and felt being in love. Nicole’s eyes gleamed brightly, color danced in them, her deepest inner beauty radiated from her heart and soul. Are we in love, I questioned myself. Is asking that question confirmation that I am in love with Nicole?
Suddenly, a little girl voice asked, “How long is forever?” We laughed and the spell broke.
“Forever until Sponge Bob is over.” The pain came immediately as a sharp fingernail dug into the palm of my hand.
Later, toward noon, I told Nicole about dinner reservations at The Running Stag. It has a reputation for good food, atmosphere, and live music. It is not a four star restaurant; however, people dress nicely, no jeans and t-shirts. “Ted,” she screamed. “You should have told me earlier. I have to go shopping.” I heard her saying something else as the door closed.
Mom came running hearing the commotion. “What was that,” she demanded.
“I just told Nicole about dinner plans for The Running escort pendik Stag. She screamed about needing to go shopping and took off.”
“Of course she screamed,” mom laughed, “she wants to look perfect for her man.” I remember reading in history class about a bomb used in Vietnam. They called it a daisy cutter, 2000 pounds of explosives designed for air burst. Mom’s latest comment exploded just like that.
“Her man? What is that supposed to mean?” Shock in my voice was clear hearing mom state to me I am Nicole’s man.
“Tomorrow will be a good day for all four of us to have a frank discussion,” with a wink, mom walked away.
Nicole burst into the house, “Ted, look what I bought to wear tonight.” Her excitement made me think of mom’s words, her man. “Isn’t this dress just perfect!”
Holding a pale blue cotton dress up for my inspection, I looked saying, “Pretty dress on the hanger, I can’t wait to see it on the pretty lady.”
“Not until I’m ready. When will we leave? I have to be perfect for my man,” she gushed.
A second detonation of a daisy cutter came, “Nicole, everyone seems to know what we have never talked about. Is tonight the night you and I come to grips with being in love?”
“Is that an admission, Thomas Edward Davidson?” Nicole’s voice came out muted, soft, barely a whisper.
I inhaled long and deeply, exhaled slowly and completely. “I am in love with Nicole Elizabeth Swanson.”
“Then the answer is, tonight we come to grips with being in love with each other.”
“Dinner reservation is for 7:00, we need to leave by 6:15. Nicole, mom knows.”
Nicole gave no acknowledgement to, mom knows. “Give me a last brother and adopted sister hug and kiss. Tonight the world changes for us.” We locked in a last hug as brother, adopted sister, and broke with a sweet peck on the lips. “Now I have to get ready, I need the big bathroom. Get your stuff and use the little bathroom.”
Smiling, I said, “Already taking over my life.”
The rest of the story is not important and I will fast forward to the conclusion. Another four years passed, I am 23 and Nicole is 22. I finished college and got a good entry-level job in my career field. I still live at home but not for much longer. Nicole is almost finished with college and at the end of the spring semester, she graduates and will move from the only real home she ever had.
She did decide to change her name to Davidson and officially did the week after graduation when she became Mrs. Nicole Davidson.
I have to revise my thinking a little. I still believe shit happens, although I now believe there may be something to the preordination and free choice concepts. Tomorrow I will awake to my first good morning hug and kiss from NED.
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